So much time, so nothing new

It has been forever since I've written. But it's always that way now it seems. I'm currently on a journey of self discovery but I usually keep those around me in the dark about my interior motives. They're are not homicidal! I realize that nowadays you have to ensure people or else they can get mixed messages and something that's totally not true. However, people are not always what they say they are... People are random... Before I totally go off the wagon and start complaining about people that I dislike, and what I dislike about them... I'll just change the subject to something a little less extreme and a little less awkward.

I'm sure whomever reads this could probably tell that I enjoy writing, and probably should get into something that could really help my writing improve. I originally wanted to be a journalist, but the college that I'll be attending doesn't offer it.. I had to go with my second choice which is Psychology. It has some certain writing aspect to it, but not as much as I would love. Eh, things don't turn out how you want them... But I don't believe that. People use that saying all the time when they can't get something they won't, but I won't give up. If it takes me 10 years to go to school for journalism then so be it.

Now unto music. Recently I have opened my mind to the new possibilities of varoius music. At first, when I started to like music, I retained only 3 bands : Evanescence, Avril Lavigne, and Garbage. Now, it's upto somewhere around 20 bands/artists. They usually retain around the genres of my first three bands/artists, because they are central to the my preferred tastes. There are exceptions though. Such as Fergie, or ABBA. Fergie as many know is more like a Pop/Hip Hop kind of ordeal. While ABBA is Europop/Disco.

I find that I really like ABBA's music. I know it's old, but not that old. Their first album was released like in the early 70's. I can't really explain one reason why I like them, because there is more than one reason. I can say though why I got into them in the first place. I was watching the TV show MADtv on youtube, it was a skit on one of my favourite characters "Miss Swan". She accidentally went to a gay bar and realized that she couldn't find someone to like her. Then music started coming on, and everyone began dancing. She went over to a bar stool and started singing "Dancing Queen". I didn't really like it because of how she sang it, so I looked it up on Napster. That's how I came across ABBA, and the song "Dancing Queen" started it all. Even now, I find that "Dancing Queen" is my favorite and always will be. It was also the first music video that I saw by them.

Now, onto my Language skills. I would say now that my linguistic skills have improved immensely. I can communicate rather comfortably in French, with some minor problems. Those problems in being not knowing some translations for vocabulary, and not knowing some verbs. I've got the grammar down, except with some very VERY difficult things. They are too complicated to even try to discuss. Anyway, I can write French now without having to think much about it. Many French acquintances tell me that it (French) has improved a lot. Spanish itself has too. I don't even study it, but I'm around speakers from Mexico and Guatemala all the time now. I listen their converstations with my mother and am able to catch onto what the conversation is about. I've been told by them that I have a very good accent when it comes to Spanish... Hmm, could it be natural? Well I do like Salsa and hot stuff.

Well here is my update that is very long overdue.

"Dig in the Dancing Queen!"

Through my own veins....

The name of this entry may sound a little funky huh? Well it's supposed to. It's a line from the song by Evanescence called "The Last Song I'm Wasting on You". Which is a very beautiful song, talking about life, and how horrible relationships can turn out; then overcoming those issues and getting away from them. I recommend that you listen to that song, it's very beautiful. But then again, every single word that Amy Lee (of Evanescence) puts down is beautiful without a doubt.

You're probably wondering why I am writing about this song or of Amy Lee or even of Evanescence... It's because I'm going to go see them in the Quest Arena in Boise on November 20th! HELL YEAH! Finally my favorite singer in the entire world decides to come to IDAHO! I'm so overly excited I can't even explain what I'm going through... My friends Kira and Trevin bought me the ticket to go with them. Kira is a big Evanescence fan but I don't know about Trevin. Oh well! My older brother was supposed to get me the ticket but he won't get paid until TODAY! So with the money my brother will be giving me, I'll pay them back!

I sure do hope they give out free things at the concert, or I hope I'll get some money somehow! Cause' I'd love to buy a bunch of souvenirs to remember that the greatest band in the world came and I saw them!

An Open Book

Hmm, it seems like it has been litterally months since I have last written on this thing. It's not that I haven't wanted to but more because I have to go to the Public Library in order to access the internet.. Anyway...

Today I am obviously at the Public Library now, I'm supposed to be searching for jobs, and staffing services... It's really really stupid.. I have to take this job class in Nampa every monday and friday until I manage to find a job. But before then I have to accomplish all of these things that the people want... Like the staffing, submitting 8 applications per week, and staying at the 3 hour classes learning things I already know. Talk about irrelevant eh?

But I can't really do anything until I find a stupid job and join the "Workforce".. I just don't like the idea of having to work because I find that using my own time to help benefit another person is no good at all... Can you believe that Mcdonalds wouldn't even hire me? I mean MCDONALDS! It's a lot harder than I really would've thought it to be, and I'm just thinking about dropping the class.. I don't care if I get "sactioned" really... It's my choice to be there.

Enough complaing...

End of The Road

So graduation is coming up in a few weeks. Or merely just about 12 days. I had always believed I would never see this day come, nor would I experience it. People always told me that the final year in High School just flies by; I never beleived that. But now, I do. I'm perfectly on track, and I could even fail my chemistry class and still graduate ( as it is an elective class..). Currently, in Chemistry, we are doing a sort of "Final Project", which is absolutely ridiculous. I hate it. But, we're almost finished, so why should I be complaining? Because we have to present it to the entire class. I hate presenting, and having to speak in front of everyone. Especially people in the Junior class.. They are such idiots, except a certain few.. But the ones that are dumb are the kind of people who would laugh at you if you were to be getting beat up...

A good thing about this year coming to an end is the yearbook. I hope to have all my friends sign it. A bad thing though it that Daniela has to go back to Germany soon.. And I will really miss her, she and I became good friends through the course of the year. But, I'm sure we'll still talk through Email and Myspace; it's just that it won't be the same.. The other exchange students I don't think I'll miss that much. Except Moa... But the others I didn't really get to know, or I just don't like.. There is going to be a party for the International Club this Friday and I won't be going because it's at the house of the Ukraine kid which in particular, I just don't like that much. (I should delete him from my Myspace?)...

Well, In short Graduation is coming up. New memories will be made, old ones will be put away.. New friends will become good friends and I sitll need to plan out my future!

Always New

I'm very happy. Or content I should say as that seems to be more explanatory than happy. Anyway, since I had previously been unable to pay for my trip to France in the spring, some of my teachers had gotten together and payed for the ticket. I think it was very kind of them. School isn't as hard as I had explained of the first week. It's improved, and much more easier than ever. Chemistry is still the most ridiculus class I have to take. All of my classes except Chemistry are great, Economics is going nice even Government.
Since I have been in Government class, we have been learning of the Constitution. I liked it so much that I downloaded a PDF form, I know, nerdy.. But it's actually a really good read. It's hard to believe that a group of men wrote something so great, and it's still in use even today!
I'm actually in some clubs this year unlike last year. I'm in Recycling, French and the International Club; where I get to design the T-shirt. No one else came up with a design, and everyone liked it. I'm beginning soon, I just needed to get a tutorial so I could adjust some images in Photoshop.
I've made some new friends this year; which should be no surprise at all for anyone. We have a foreign exchange student from Germany, and she's really cool. She invited me to join the International Club; the idea of the club was mainly from the students in the exchange. She's (Daniela) is teaching me some simple German phrases, like "Clock" or "Television". She's also really funny, she does have an attiude but she only gets it if she is really irratated.
French class is going good too. We're covering a lot of stuff that is going to obviously be useful. I really need to come up with some more sentences for that class soon. We have to tell our teacher a certain amount of sentences each semester for a grade; not really hard, but hard to come up with the sentences.
There is so much more I want to write about, but I think I would be digging a little deep, and exposing myself a little, but maybe I should save the rest for my Myspace blog...

Evil Bible....

I know that many Christians pride themselves for being "saved" from hell.. But, recently I found a website which closely analyzes the things within it's pages. Not all what's in it is good, there are many references to Rape, Murder, and Sacrificing. People say that God is merciful, and helpful. But, what kind of God tells a man to sacrifice his own daughter to keep her from losing her virginity? Or about how he told a man to sacrifice his son upon a mountain? God even told the man to lie to his son, and get him to help build the place of which he would be killed. For example there is this quote which is found in the book of Genesis:

"Take your son, your only son-yes, Isaac, whom you love so much- and go to the land of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offerening on one of the mountains, which I will point out to you."(Genesis 22:1-18)


It seems kind of fishy doesn't it? I thought that God was a kind, and loving being, but to have read this, it is kind of messed up actually. Some of my close friends are Christians, or Mormons, or off of a branch of Christianity. I couldn't believe it, and then I kept reading on the website, and found things that referred to Rape, Murder, and Slavery! A book of piece?? It's more like the Satanic Bible!


When I was going into the one tab labeled "Rape in the Bible", I found this one:As you approach a town to attack it, first offer its people terms for peace. If they accept your terms and open the gates to you, then all the people inside will serve you in forced labor. But if they refuse to make peace and prepare to fight, you must attack the town. When the LORD your God hands it over to you, kill every man in the town. But you may keep for yourselves all the women, children, livestock, and other plunder. You may enjoy the spoils of your enemies that the LORD your God has given you.(Deuteronomy 20:10-14)


This one speaks of Murder, deception, and Slavery! It tells of God telling whoever is doing the deed to lie to all those people, and take it over. Use the people for slaves, and kill all the men there. God also approves to the people to keep the women, children and livestock.. So basically doing another sin against God, Stealing...

And this one on Rape: (Judges 21:10-24 NLT)

The Israelite assembly sent a peace delegation to the little remnant of Benjamin who were living at the rock of Rimmon. Then the men of Benjamin returned to their homes, and the four hundred women of Jabesh-gilead who were spared were given to them as wives. But there were not enough women for all of them. The people felt sorry for Benjamin because the LORD had left this gap in the tribes of Israel. So the Israelite leaders asked, "How can we find wives for the few who remain, since all the women of the tribe of Benjamin are dead? There must be heirs for the survivors so that an entire tribe of Israel will not be lost forever. But we cannot give them our own daughters in marriage because we have sworn with a solemn oath that anyone who does this will fall under God's curse."

Then they thought of the annual festival of the LORD held in Shiloh, between Lebonah and Bethel, along the east side of the road that goes from Bethel to Shechem. They told the men of Benjamin who still needed wives, "Go and hide in the vineyards. When the women of Shiloh come out for their dances, rush out from the vineyards, and each of you can take one of them home to be your wife! And when their fathers and brothers come to us in protest, we will tell them, 'Please be understanding. Let them have your daughters, for we didn't find enough wives for them when we destroyed Jabesh-gilead. And you are not guilty of breaking the vow since you did not give your daughters in marriage to them.'" So the men of Benjamin did as they were told. They kidnapped the women who took part in the celebration and carried them off to the land of their own inheritance. Then they rebuilt their towns and lived in them. So the assembly of Israel departed by tribes and families, and they returned to their own homes.

This is all kind of sick to me. No wonder I am smart and don't have a religion... It's all full of such treachery, false modesty, lies, and deception. It all seems to be apart a much larger conspiracy, one that needs to blown wide open.

Such Tired Times

Over the past couple of days I have been in school. It started like 5 days ago, and I hoped it would be fun. But, it's not. It is the hardest year of school I have ever had in my entire school career. Firstly, Government is very difficult, anyone who says that it is easy deserves to be bitch slapped. I thought it would be easy as long as I do the work, and I have been. However, my teacher thinks it's very funny to give us 4 assignments to do, they're all do on seperate days, but they aren't that easy. 2 of them were ok, but the other two weren't. I still need to finish my stupid Scavenger Hunt...
I have always hated Science, and everything associated with this subject. I'm taking Chemistry, and I hate it. I just wish the entire section would just collapse, and end my worries. Honestly, I thought Chemistry was a subject where you utilise your knowledge of chemicals? Why must we learn to convert Gallons to liters, Inches to miles? It has nothing to do with science, what the hell are people taking? I only have this class so I can go to college, but I really don't think I want to that much anymore. I have to pass all my classes now in order to go anyhow. I'm required to community service for my Government class, yeah, right when I have enough to worry about, talk about stupid.
My French class is the best one, we do work, but it's the work that I really enjoy doing. I love the French Language, and everything associated with it. I'm in the Advanced class, so I don't need to hide my extensive knowledge over a third year. I do need to work on the past tense, but not by much. I don't understand the elements of use, it's very different than that of English. I also have trouble with the subjunctive, it's much more harder than the English subjunctive by far. The French subjunctive is only used in a sense of doubt, worry, etc in the speakers mind at the time. I was told on Monday, that I get to go to France with the class, and I'm pretty happy about that. I just need to get a job, so my Mom doesn't have to pay all of it. Plus, I would like to have extra money to spend, and buy souvenirs, and also anything I might need or want.
The first week of school was difficult, even English class is hard! God, I know all of the English language already even the subjunctive!(ex. It's imporant that I be there) or maybe it's because it's the language that I grew up knowing. We have to read our books, and right down a daily log on it, damnit, I just remebered that I need to do read a few chapters today! I also have to finish my freaking Chemistry labs(2 in 2 days!).